|Julie R. Enszer|
|When Grace Got Married
Even in reruns, I cry during the episode
Where Grace gets married. Tears first for Will, abandoned,
Still hoping the friendship would not implode.
In twenty-two minutes, Grace, with the perfect companion,
Leaves Will: suddenly another thirty-something has been,
The proverbial New York SGM with a married best friend.
Then, I cry, angry with Grace for finding the perfect husband
A nice Jewish doctor. She invoked her privilege, embraced
A white dress, chuppah. Her left hand flaunts a wedding band.
I cry for myself as well. Will and Grace
Struggled valiantly with the same notions of friendship
We did. They wanted to create a relational space
Outside the sexually coupled world. Friendship
That primarily nurtured and sustained.
No words to describe the unlikely partnership,
But ample support, chaste affection, retained
Sexuality. Unwittingly, they challenged us to consider:
Can a primary relationship be maintained
Without sex? Even after my own disaster,
I watched that show and I believed, yes, I believed.
Where you and I failed, Lis, what we cast asunder,
I watched with rapt attention, almost relieved,
Dreaming of the possibility of familial success for Will
And Grace. Was it so impossible to conceive
Of idealized friendship surviving still?
I rooted for them against all logic, against all reason.
Then Grace got married. I wept. It made me ill.
It didn't work for them either, after just five seasons.
Perhaps it cannot. Perhaps it never will. Perhaps our innate
Biological being compels us to couple, demands
That we find a spiritual, emotional, and sexual mate.
I don't know. All I know is Grace got married.
So, Will better get out there and date.
Now that Grace is married, there will come a time,
If not sooner than later, when Grace won't even
Respond to Will's email, just as you don't respond to mine.